If you could describe 2011 with just one word, what would it be?  Frustrating. Happy. Why. I could not settle on just one single word.  But as we say goodbye to this year past, here are some of my favorite posts.

The War Against the Holidays – When a person – via spoken word, email, card, text, or facebook message – wishes me a happy holiday or sends me seasons greetings, I am not offended.  It makes me happy that someone took the time to wish me joy during the season!

What To Do When a Child is Abused – Physical abuse, mental abuse, verbal abuse, abuse by neglect, and abuse by placing children in bad and unacceptable situations – all are devastating to a child.  And then add sexual abuse to the mix and the lives that are altered in unimaginable ways grow disproportionately. There are no excuses for this abuse.  There are no excuses for NOT REPORTING this abuse (or any other).  As adults, we MUST do what is often difficult and terrifying. But remember – your own difficulties and terror PALE in comparison to what an abused child goes through.

My Baby Turned 21 Today- I found myself always holding her, even when she slumbered.  I sat in my bentwood rocker and looked at the leaves turning gold outside while I cuddled my newborn.  Sleepy. Exhausted. Sore.  They were the happiest days of my life.

Guilty of Unfriending the Annoying – ??  UNFRIEND! I have empowered myself to just say no.  To not let those who constantly annoy me take up my valuable computer time with witless repeats of ridiculous posts.

Don’t Mess With Mama – Whoever said raising a son is easy hasn’t met my boy. The little prince (and I use that term loosely as of late) is about to turn nine years old. He is apparently at “that” age. You know the one, were he likes to test the adults to see what all he can get away with.

Why My House is a Mess – I only finished one coffee table – cleaned and dusted!  I started on the buffet next to the stairs and stopped… there’s a chance I might have said a little wirty-dord in the process.  Why? Because every time I tried to put something away – endless undone pieces of projects – someone would fuss.  “Why did you put that in a drawer? It’s out of sight so I won’t remember to do it.”

I’ll Be That Mom – I once had a shirt that upon reflection was pretty hideous.  I realized how bad it was when my husband and I were driving and I glanced at the 65-year old(‘ish) woman we were passing.  We had twin shirts.  That particular white with purple and blue flowered garment became a part of my pajama drawer.

Murphy’s Law of Family – Driving in the car last night, my daughter got angry at me and yelled, “Big Stupid!” in my direction.  My husband and I discussed with her how she’d like it if we nicknamed her Big Stupid.

Family. Perhaps that’s the one word that would best describe 2011 for me.  I’ll miss this year, but am looking forward to new adventures with the husband and kids in 2012.

Photo by Ben Fitzgerald-O’Connor.

Get the Elf off the shelf and shove it to the back of a dark deep closet.  Okay, I know that’s probably very anti-Christmas of me to say, but I think the little fellas are just creepy.  Perhaps that’s the point… that the elf is WATCHING YOU and reporting back to Santa.

One of my friends posted dozens of photos of the activities she planned around the elf with her own children. There was the day for the “Magic Elf Seeds” where her kids planted peppermints in a bowl of oatmeal dirt.  One morning her kids woke up with “red noses” – a prank by the elf (they knew this because a card said, “Go look in the mirror! Tee hee!”).  The elf supervised a gingerbread house party where a group of kids each got to decorate their own house.   And one morning, the kids woke up to find miniature marshmallows scattered around stuffed animals who had a marshmallow fight (see photo).

First, this seems like an awful lot of work (in my opinion).  Second, I think that the elf causes that kind of mischief is not really a good thing.  Third, how creepy that an elf is “watching” the kids and pulling pranks?!?!

I agree, I agree, I agree (did I say I agree?) with what Jamie of Blonde Mom Blog says,

Suddenly, however, there are minions of mothers hell bent on destroying those of us who subscribe to the quaint and simple Elf on a Shelf fun. These Elf on a Shelfinistas continually set the bar higher with elaborate Elf on a Shelf pranks and portrait sessions that take longer than the Kardashians’ annual Christmas card photo shoot.

I see all you jacked up on eggnog moms posting your artsy fartsy Instagram pictures of your Elf on a Shelf. You’ve got your thrill-seeking zip lining elves, your makeshift hot tub in a coffee mug elves, and your “don’t be naughty” note writing elves.

Sheesh!  Cut it out already!

PS – I love you Angie even though I think this whole elf trend you are perpetrating is crazy!

From our Shak to yours, wishing you a very Merry Christmas!

The year I got a tin of popcorn – and that was it – from my family was the worst Christmas gift year.  Yes, I had a couple of other items under the tree, but that was the only thing I had not bought myself.  It hurt a little, that Christmas.

But as I read the posts on Terrible Christmas Gifts, I feel better about my own bad Christmas!

Our last Christmas together, I was expecting a nice gift-really any gift store bought. My then-husband told me several times he was going out Christmas shopping. When Christmas morning arrived, he was hungover drunk after being out all night. I showed him his gifts-clothing and such. When I asked about my gift, he said “I ain’t got nothing for you”. Then he pulls out a crumpled $20 bill and told me to go by myself something. Just like that. I kicked him out not long after and later divorced him.

Yep… my own tin of popcorn was pretty good afterall!

My young’uns asked yesterday whether or not they got Christmas presents when they were babies and too young to remember.  Yes, was my answer.

“You got diapers!”

The look of disgust on their faces made me laugh.  But 20′ish years later, I do have to now struggle to remember what they got.  I imagine possibly clothes, maybe some toy blocks or a rattle.

For me the earliest memory of my own Christmas presents was a Chatty Cathy doll.  And that’s probably because I’ve seen it in old photos and don’t have a true memory of it.

What about you?  What the first Christmas present you remember receiving?

One of my first colleagues that turned into a good friend was a Christian woman married to a Jewish man.   Seeing how they seamlessly managed an interfaith marriage was a beautiful thing.  Every year when I send a Christmas card (and I do so without shame), I always wished her husband a Happy Hanukkah alongside her Merry Christmas.

I really enjoyed the post written at On Being Both about her interfaith experiences,

A Sprinkling of Christmas, and Hanukkah. I made Christmas and Hanukkah cookies with a fabulous group of women friends. I try not to mix the holidays together, and I am not the least bit comfortable with the star-of-David tree-topper being marketed this year, but I think it’s kosher to let Hanukkah and Christmas cookies co-exist on a counter-top for a few seconds before they are devoured.

So to any of our Jewish readers, tonight I wish you a joyful Hanukkah season.

Photo by Ron Almog.

When I say “Mom” in Mom’s meltdown, I am – unfortunately – talking about myself.  I am an old Momma and I’ve had plenty of life experiences, so crying is not something that happens often.  I cry at funerals. I cry at some weddings. And I cry when I get really really mad.   I was so angry at my daughters last night that they made me cry.  (Yes I am embarrassed to admit this!)

My problem stems from working about 50-60 hours every week, which by some standards isn’t brutal.  However, I’ve been doing this for a year now and then spend weekends on-call where I often go back in due to some emergency (house fires, police arrests, etc.).   Add to that my massive cooking over the weekend, Christmas shopping (for the kids), and a touch of housecleaning.  Meanwhile the kids stay up all night – waking me periodically with squeals and yells, running, and laughter.  I wake up tired, go to work, and come home to find the house a mess and children who just woke up.

I asked all weekend for their help cleaning the house and got no help.  So at 10:00 o’clock Sunday night, my bedtime because I’m old (hahaha), I finally lost it.

I won’t go into any details further than there was snot and snotty tears, topped with a heavy dose of guilt tossed their way.

When I got home today, my house was clean.

Sometimes a good old fashioned Momma Meltdown can be a good thing!

Photo by Emran Kassim.

The extent of my good deeds at Christmas are donating toys to programs that brings gifts to needy children, donating food for the hungry, baking cookies for my colleagues, and being generous to the bell ringers raising money for the Salvation Army.  I sure wish I had the resources to do what “Ben’s wife” did,

Before she left the store Tuesday evening, the Indianapolis woman in her mid-40s had paid the layaway orders for as many as 50 people. On the way out, she handed out $50 bills and paid for two carts of toys for a woman in line at the cash register.

“She was doing it in the memory of her husband who had just died, and she said she wasn’t going to be able to spend it and wanted to make people happy with it,” Deppe said. The woman did not identify herself and only asked people to “remember Ben,” an apparent reference to her husband.

Practice random acts of kindness – as you’re able – this season. There is always something you can do to help, even if it’s just saying a kind word.

Photo by Lori Ann.