I belong to a mom’s group. A mother in the group expressed her hesitation and fears about sending her son to preschool for the first time. She said she was a nervous wreck and kept second guessing her decision to send him. The first day ended up going very well and although she cried, her son did not.

Although I am home with my children, I made the decision to send my son to preschool last fall. I felt that he needed the social interaction with other children. Also, I wanted him to get a sense of a structured learning environment before he entered kindergarten. It has gone amazingly well and I am very glad I sent him.

For me, the decision was not as hard to make as it was for the lady in my mom’s group. After having three kids, I have learned a few things along the way. Most of what I learned stemmed from a natural progression rather than a great epiphany.

With my first son, I coddled him more and gave in to what he demanded more. With my second, I learned to say no better and stick with it. I was able to "train" him more rather than letting him "train" me! By the time I had my third son, my "devoted" time with him was spread out between three children so it was another learning adjustment for me. What I found out through these years are things I wish I knew the first time around:

• It is okay to say no even when you are met with a disappointed face
• A little bit of crying it out is necessary sometimes so that your child understands you mean it
• Train the child before he/she trains you because SOMEONE is getting trained, let it be you!
• You don’t have to entertain the child every second of the day. Let them find ways to entertain themselves otherwise they will grow up getting bored easily.
• If they don’t eat at a meal, don’t stress about it. You really can’t make them eat and they will eventually eat when they get hungry.
• It is only natural to want to overprotect your child and keep them with you safe and sound. However, teaching your child to be independent is probably one of the best things you can do for him/her.

That last item leads me back to preschool. Aside from teaching some basic pre-K skills, it helps them to learn how to be independent from Mommy. Sure, they could learn this in Kindergarten but I think these days children need this before they reach elementary school. With so many working mothers, there is a large percentage of kids that are already advanced (compared to 20 or so years ago) by the time they reach kindergarten.

I think my friend made a great decision to send her son to preschool. When my youngest guy gets to be that age, I will send him too.