Kathy T’s struggling with her almost-teenager:

The only stress right now is the youngest kid who is 12 and thinks she
should be allowed to walk to the park with her boyfriend after school.
Um, NO.  Final answer.  Why am I so strict?  Because I accidentally
read a text message he sent her. Accidentally on purpose.  With  him,
the answer will NEVER be yes.  So she informs the husband that the
biggest mistake he ever made in his life was marrying “her” she says
pointing to me.  Is it illegal to throttle our kids?  I love my
daughter.  I do.  But I want to lock her in a room and slide bread
scraps and cheese under the door to her.

Recently I was in a fight with my 13 year old, Flip. I looked over at him, seething with anger, and I thought back to my own 13 year old self and realized he was sitting there hating me, just as I did my own mother nearly 20 years ago. I said, "You know, it’s okay to hate me."

"No! Mama, I love you, I just…" Flip responded with all the angst of the 13 year old heart.

"No, I understand. I remember hating my mom, too. I think everyone hates their parents at some point or another, and it’s okay. You just have to watch and be careful that you don’t let those angry, hate feelings take over." Flip was shocked that I ever hated my mom, we get along so well now that I’m older. But I think we all go through it when we’re teenagers, that anger and hatred. And as a parent, it hurts, but really, haven’t you wanted to pitch your teenager out the window sometimes when they’re being mouthy? The door swings both ways, my friends. Both ways. Give your kids the gift of their feelings. They will come back when they’re ready.